Desire - Day 6

 I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participating in the ‘feeling’ of desire

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want  and ‘desire’ things through participation in the mind within energy , in which these desires aren’t logical and many not even possible

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to desire things outside of myself ‘thinking, ‘feeling’ it will make my life experience more enjoyable

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not see that a lot of these ‘wants’, ‘desires’ I ‘think’ about are rooted in dishonesty, ego, comparison, fears

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing that if I continue to go into the ‘feeling’ of ‘desire’ and constantly wanting things that I don’t yet have, that it will make my experience, here in the moment go to shit, as my mind is elsewhere, projecting, ‘thinking’, ‘feeling’ I need something to make my experience here, in the moment better

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to get stuck in the constant pattern of desire and thus making it a habit, in which I ‘desire’ things like wanting more money, a specific job, a specific car, specific relationships, a specific body type, women, clothes, specific experiences projected into the future

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not see that there’s nothing wrong with wanting to change specific aspects of your life, or wanting specific things but it’s to look at the starting point of why you want those things. Is it because of ego, comparison, fear, projections, inferiority or because there’s specific aspects in your life that do need to change, because you may have an opportunity to get a better job to make more money in which it would be logical to take that opportunity. Will specific clothing be needed in specific settings due to work/environment change or is it because you want to show off designer brand clothing. Are you going to the gym to get in shape and build a specific physique because that’s what you want for yourself and it’s a healthy hobby to have or is it to attract women ? Do you want new relationships with new people/women because it’s fun/supportive to have cool people around you, or is it because you want something from them or because they can do something for you ? Do you want that specific car because you like the design of that car, it’s effectiveness, how it looks, or is to project a certain image to once again attract women or just as a status symbol in general ? It’s crucial to look at the starting point of all these things and why you do what you do.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to deceive myself into participating within ‘desire’ in all aspects of my life constantly ‘feeling’ I’m in lack there of, or I don’t have enough, or I ‘feel’ less than another because that person may have more than me in what ever aspect of life that is.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not see the majority of the ‘desires’ I had in the past were from the starting point of ego, comparison, fears, worries, judgements, memories, past experiences, projections, ideas, beliefs I created about myself, the world and the system that we live in

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not see sooner, that it is crucial to change the starting point of many of these desires and to just flat out drop many of them because I no longer ‘desire’ many of these things in my life but due to the mind participation, energy participation within my mind, there’s lingering effects of these ‘desires’ that get shown to me while I’m out and about during my day, in which specific thoughts, memories, comparison, fears, judgements, in relation to these ‘desires’ come up

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to create an energetic attachment to ‘desire’, as it shows its self during my daily life routines and that I need to let go of these energetic attachments because these thoughts will continually pop in relation to these ‘desires’ and when they do come up in a moment, it generally doesn’t ‘feel’ good, you go into ‘feelings’ of comparison, lack of, inferiority, like a failure, fears, self judgements 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to create my wants and ‘desires’ from the starting point of ego, in which when ever I participated in these different  thoughts/projections of desire, it was always from the point of winning/losing, better than/less than, I have more/they have less, always wanting, ‘desiring’ more and constantly participating within this pattern, you’ll create more ‘feelings’ of ‘desire’ because you’ll feel like you’re lacking, when in reality it is a system of the ego, to feed it energy, to keep it charged up, because when you participate in this ‘feeling’, the ego is the only one that benefits

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not see that I continue to participate within the thought/pattern/habit/construct of ‘desire’, that it will compound, and I will have to walk a specific process in relation to ‘desire’ and will have to walk backwards to cleanse/sort myself of the energetic attachment/addiction I have within this ‘feeling’, better to stop al participation within the ‘feeling’ of ‘desire’, and not create anymore as I have plenty of the shit inside of me currently that I must cleanse myself of

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not see how the specific ‘feeling’ and participation with ‘desire’ will cause you to ‘feel’ a consistent lack of, ‘feeling’ like you don’t have enough, ‘feeling’ like you’re not good enough, ‘feeling’ like you need more to have a specific experience within/outside of yourself, ‘feeling’ in a state of need, and constantly wanting more and more no matter what aspect of my life ‘desire’ exists within

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to see that the origin of the majority of ‘desires’ I have is Ego, it always has been, comparing myself to others in all areas of life, always from the starting point of ‘fear’ and ‘comparison’. Had I had the tools of self self honesty, breath, self writing, self forgiveness and self corrective statements to apply much earlier, a lot of these thoughts/systems/habits/constructs of ‘desire’ would’ve been avoided, but the reality is I created it and I’m responsible for my creation. I in a specific time chose to participate in this form of mind participation, and now I must do the self work to get these ‘desires’ out of me, as I can feel it weighing my body and mind down, which isn’t necessary. It is unnecessary pressure to put on yourself, mind and body, better to be here, within breath, self honesty, and taking things breath by breath, moment by moment and to not project into the future within wants and ‘desires’ as that’s somewhere out there, in the mind, the future, not here in this moment of breath. Letting go of the many illogical desires, wants, needs will allow you to be here, more present, comfortable within what and who you are in the moment, instead of allowing the Ego to dictate what you want/‘desire’ , focus on what you can do, what you can/should change, what needs to be changed based within the circumstances of your life now. No need to go into the mind to ‘think’, ‘feel’, ‘desire’ you ‘need’ shit you really don’t.

I commit myself to stop participating in the ‘feeling’ of ‘desire’ in the many forms it exist

I commit myself to stop creating unnecessary ‘desires’ within myself

I commit myself to stop ‘feeling’ like I’m in a lack, or have less, or don’t have enough due to the ‘feeling’ and participation within ‘desire’

I commit myself to change the starting point of many ‘desires’ I have and created within , as some may be logical and many illogical

I commit myself to stop allowing the energetic attachment of ‘desires’ I have within, in which many start to dominate how I am experiencing  myself in the moment, affecting my inner peace, self confidence, creating fears, worries, concerns

I commit myself to not allow ‘desire’ to dictate my physical movements/actions through out the day and instead live here within breath, moment by moment

I commit myself to see, realize how ‘desire’ is connected to the Ego and many other emotions such as fear, judgement, comparison , memories, ideas, beliefs, past/future projections, inferiority/superiority that I created towards myself, the people around me and the world